ericadawn16 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
ericadawn16) wrote2009-11-28 11:33 pm
ericadawn16) wrote2009-11-28 11:33 pm
Jack- November 16th, 2009
Title: But Time Didn’t Stop
Characters: Jack Jack/Ianto
Rated: PG-13 ANGST COE Spoilers MPREG
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Summary: Jack reads about Ianto's secret being found out.
Author's Note: Starts after COE and yes, the dates might be weird.
Previous Segment: November 15th, 2009, Part Two
Masterlist: http://ericadawn16.livejournal.com/63337.html
November 16th, 2009
“April 11, 2007 Jack has hired a new girl to replace Suzie. I can tell she likes Jack, who wouldn’t? I’ll have to watch her. The scientist from Japan is coming next month to make Lisa better. If she starts shagging him, then everything is ruined,” the man recited and wondered when Ianto and Gwen had become such good friends.
“May 14, 2007 I want to die. I want to be finished with this. Everything hurts and I don’t see how it could ever be better again, but I can’t because Jack took everything away from me, even my belts. He’s staring at me even now across the room. I’m tempted to burn my other diaries so he or anyone else won’t read them especially my sister. I’m not sure which would be worse; if Rhi found them mortifying or interesting, but I can’t bring myself to destroy them. They’re my proof of the last three years,” the former leader of Torchwood read and remembered that time. He had been so worried that he’d have to take Ianto to Flat Holm or Providence Park. However, the young man had pulled through and he’d allowed him back at work to prove himself while giving him something to do. It was all of the things that hadn’t worked in his case.
In June, Ianto had returned to work although Jack was the only one who’d talk to him at first.
“June 11, 2007 I took Mica to McDonalds since I missed her birthday. It was nice to see how she’s amused by everything and wants to know about anything. However, it also makes me think of the children that Lisa and I had planned. Obviously, I can’t have that with Jack. There is adoption, but who in their right mind would give Torchwood a child? Besides, I keep waiting for Jack to grow bored with me. It’s only a matter of time,” Jack recited and rubbed his bump, “Never just a blip in time, Ianto.”
He paused in his reading to order room service.
The July entries detailed the Jasmine incident among others and they tried to redefine their relationship as something other than what it was; more talking than shagging.
For his twenty-fourth birthday, Jack took him to the movies and a dinner at home before ravishing him. He remembered thinking how Ianto was starting to become more comfortable with a male lover.
In September, they had a one year memorial for the Battle of Canary Wharf which he gave Ianto the day off for as well as a hotel room and spa treatment, but Gwen had given so much grief that he’d gone with Ianto the next year. He wondered if anyone had gone this year.
“October 22, 2007 Since it’s exactly one year since we officially met, I put on that original outfit which led to Jack suggesting roleplay. We pretended not know one another and I was some guy he met in the park, but I can’t describe the feeling I get when he smiles at me. It’s like my whole body is happy,” the man read and had to smile. Ianto had made him feel the same.
“November 12, 2007 Jack maintains that there is no afterlife and it’s all blackness. Gwen said that Suzie said the same thing. I don’t know what to believe anymore. How could the God I thought I knew allow things like Canary Wharf or what happened in New York to happen? What’s the point of it all? Maybe you really do just die and that’s the end of you,” the former leader of Torchwood recited and it made him sad; all that earlier optimism had been sapped away. How much of that had been his fault? Should he have tried harder? However, on the other hand…
“I’m not the most optimistic person in the world, am I? I tend to assume the worst. This wasn’t how I always was,” he spoke and frowned, “Maybe that should be another goal like finding my spark again.”
He went to sleep again and when he woke up with the sun, he sighed. It was the fifth day of reading the diaries and he was on the last one.
Later, in November 2007, Ianto had asked him whether he’d ever swallowed a sixth eye or any of the Dogon Eyes. Jack admitted that he’d never had because he’d never cared about the future that much, he preferred the present. At the time, he knew the Welshman had suspected something, but now he knew that he would have read about his immortality in his company file. Perhaps, he didn’t believe what they’d written.
“December 25, 2007 I have to sell my car. I should probably have it fumigated, or steam cleaned. For the SUV, I have the upholstery redone every few months so maybe that would be the best choice. Anything so I won’t remember Jack and John Ellis dead in my car,” Jack read and he had never known that that was the first time Ianto had seem him dead.
He remembered what the Welshman had told him, ““I never got used to it. How can you get used to your lover dying?”
The immortal now had his own question he asked aloud, “How can you get used to your lover being dead?”
“January 31, 2008 Jack’s still gone and I’m CAMPING IN THE HIMALAYAS! Could things get any worse? Well, they almost did. With only two tents, I was expected to share a tent with Owen; a situation that neither of us wanted so Gwen suggested we could share a tent and Tosh could room with Owen. Gwen has been extra nice since he left. She wants to know things about me when we barely spoke a word to each other before. I’m not sure how I feel about this so half the things I tell her aren’t true. I wonder when Jack’s coming back; if he’s coming back. Sometimes, I imagine grabbing him in front of everyone and snogging him senseless like he did with me and sometimes, I just want to kill him for putting us through this,” he recited and grimaced especially at how similar it was to his own thoughts about the Doctor. The only consolation was that Jack was being put through hell at the same time.
“February 15, 2008 Jack took me to a French restaurant last night and then dancing. He does seem determined to make up for leaving us especially me. I think something happened while he was gone, but he won’t say. He hates saying anything. He’d rather put up this front of nothing ever bothering him, but I can see the cracks in it, so much more than when he left. Sometimes, I want him to just be honest with me and leave the shell at work, but I worry what would happen if all his defenses were shattered like that. He wouldn’t be Jack anymore, would he?
He’s sleeping in my bed right now as I write this. He’s never done that before and I like it. I don’t want to be hurt again when he leaves and he will, I’m sure of it, but I can’t imagine being without him again either. He keeps smiling in his sleep. Every time that I look over at him, he’s wearing a grin. At least, for the moment, I’m truly happy,” the man read and couldn’t decide between smiling and crying, “He knew me too well.”
“March 29, 2008 Owen keeps putting blood in the fridge because it isn’t as though he has a whole refrigerated unit for that! I think he does it just to take the piss out of me and I can’t even tell him to get shagged because that just makes him worse. Jack won’t take any side because he finds the whole thing amusing. Tosh suggested I come over to her place and watch the newest Bond again. She likes that Daniel Craig. I suppose he’ll do, but he’s no Connery; now he was a Bond,” the former leader of Torchwood read and smiled because he’d tried watching Bond with Ianto, but the Welshman had ended up forbidding him from making comments.
After that, his lover caught the flu and Jack had sent him home. The entries were short during those days and he remembered how he’d taken care of him which the girls had smiled about. He was capable of things other than shagging or killing aliens, why were people always so surprised?
After a brief meal, he resumed the diary.
November 17th, 2009
Characters: Jack Jack/Ianto
Rated: PG-13 ANGST COE Spoilers MPREG
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Summary: Jack reads about Ianto's secret being found out.
Author's Note: Starts after COE and yes, the dates might be weird.
Previous Segment: November 15th, 2009, Part Two
Masterlist: http://ericadawn16.livejournal.com/63337.html
November 16th, 2009
“April 11, 2007 Jack has hired a new girl to replace Suzie. I can tell she likes Jack, who wouldn’t? I’ll have to watch her. The scientist from Japan is coming next month to make Lisa better. If she starts shagging him, then everything is ruined,” the man recited and wondered when Ianto and Gwen had become such good friends.
“May 14, 2007 I want to die. I want to be finished with this. Everything hurts and I don’t see how it could ever be better again, but I can’t because Jack took everything away from me, even my belts. He’s staring at me even now across the room. I’m tempted to burn my other diaries so he or anyone else won’t read them especially my sister. I’m not sure which would be worse; if Rhi found them mortifying or interesting, but I can’t bring myself to destroy them. They’re my proof of the last three years,” the former leader of Torchwood read and remembered that time. He had been so worried that he’d have to take Ianto to Flat Holm or Providence Park. However, the young man had pulled through and he’d allowed him back at work to prove himself while giving him something to do. It was all of the things that hadn’t worked in his case.
In June, Ianto had returned to work although Jack was the only one who’d talk to him at first.
“June 11, 2007 I took Mica to McDonalds since I missed her birthday. It was nice to see how she’s amused by everything and wants to know about anything. However, it also makes me think of the children that Lisa and I had planned. Obviously, I can’t have that with Jack. There is adoption, but who in their right mind would give Torchwood a child? Besides, I keep waiting for Jack to grow bored with me. It’s only a matter of time,” Jack recited and rubbed his bump, “Never just a blip in time, Ianto.”
He paused in his reading to order room service.
The July entries detailed the Jasmine incident among others and they tried to redefine their relationship as something other than what it was; more talking than shagging.
For his twenty-fourth birthday, Jack took him to the movies and a dinner at home before ravishing him. He remembered thinking how Ianto was starting to become more comfortable with a male lover.
In September, they had a one year memorial for the Battle of Canary Wharf which he gave Ianto the day off for as well as a hotel room and spa treatment, but Gwen had given so much grief that he’d gone with Ianto the next year. He wondered if anyone had gone this year.
“October 22, 2007 Since it’s exactly one year since we officially met, I put on that original outfit which led to Jack suggesting roleplay. We pretended not know one another and I was some guy he met in the park, but I can’t describe the feeling I get when he smiles at me. It’s like my whole body is happy,” the man read and had to smile. Ianto had made him feel the same.
“November 12, 2007 Jack maintains that there is no afterlife and it’s all blackness. Gwen said that Suzie said the same thing. I don’t know what to believe anymore. How could the God I thought I knew allow things like Canary Wharf or what happened in New York to happen? What’s the point of it all? Maybe you really do just die and that’s the end of you,” the former leader of Torchwood recited and it made him sad; all that earlier optimism had been sapped away. How much of that had been his fault? Should he have tried harder? However, on the other hand…
“I’m not the most optimistic person in the world, am I? I tend to assume the worst. This wasn’t how I always was,” he spoke and frowned, “Maybe that should be another goal like finding my spark again.”
He went to sleep again and when he woke up with the sun, he sighed. It was the fifth day of reading the diaries and he was on the last one.
Later, in November 2007, Ianto had asked him whether he’d ever swallowed a sixth eye or any of the Dogon Eyes. Jack admitted that he’d never had because he’d never cared about the future that much, he preferred the present. At the time, he knew the Welshman had suspected something, but now he knew that he would have read about his immortality in his company file. Perhaps, he didn’t believe what they’d written.
“December 25, 2007 I have to sell my car. I should probably have it fumigated, or steam cleaned. For the SUV, I have the upholstery redone every few months so maybe that would be the best choice. Anything so I won’t remember Jack and John Ellis dead in my car,” Jack read and he had never known that that was the first time Ianto had seem him dead.
He remembered what the Welshman had told him, ““I never got used to it. How can you get used to your lover dying?”
The immortal now had his own question he asked aloud, “How can you get used to your lover being dead?”
“January 31, 2008 Jack’s still gone and I’m CAMPING IN THE HIMALAYAS! Could things get any worse? Well, they almost did. With only two tents, I was expected to share a tent with Owen; a situation that neither of us wanted so Gwen suggested we could share a tent and Tosh could room with Owen. Gwen has been extra nice since he left. She wants to know things about me when we barely spoke a word to each other before. I’m not sure how I feel about this so half the things I tell her aren’t true. I wonder when Jack’s coming back; if he’s coming back. Sometimes, I imagine grabbing him in front of everyone and snogging him senseless like he did with me and sometimes, I just want to kill him for putting us through this,” he recited and grimaced especially at how similar it was to his own thoughts about the Doctor. The only consolation was that Jack was being put through hell at the same time.
“February 15, 2008 Jack took me to a French restaurant last night and then dancing. He does seem determined to make up for leaving us especially me. I think something happened while he was gone, but he won’t say. He hates saying anything. He’d rather put up this front of nothing ever bothering him, but I can see the cracks in it, so much more than when he left. Sometimes, I want him to just be honest with me and leave the shell at work, but I worry what would happen if all his defenses were shattered like that. He wouldn’t be Jack anymore, would he?
He’s sleeping in my bed right now as I write this. He’s never done that before and I like it. I don’t want to be hurt again when he leaves and he will, I’m sure of it, but I can’t imagine being without him again either. He keeps smiling in his sleep. Every time that I look over at him, he’s wearing a grin. At least, for the moment, I’m truly happy,” the man read and couldn’t decide between smiling and crying, “He knew me too well.”
“March 29, 2008 Owen keeps putting blood in the fridge because it isn’t as though he has a whole refrigerated unit for that! I think he does it just to take the piss out of me and I can’t even tell him to get shagged because that just makes him worse. Jack won’t take any side because he finds the whole thing amusing. Tosh suggested I come over to her place and watch the newest Bond again. She likes that Daniel Craig. I suppose he’ll do, but he’s no Connery; now he was a Bond,” the former leader of Torchwood read and smiled because he’d tried watching Bond with Ianto, but the Welshman had ended up forbidding him from making comments.
After that, his lover caught the flu and Jack had sent him home. The entries were short during those days and he remembered how he’d taken care of him which the girls had smiled about. He was capable of things other than shagging or killing aliens, why were people always so surprised?
After a brief meal, he resumed the diary.
November 17th, 2009
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I was a little paranoid since you had Jack reading his diary in New Horizons and it was so wonderful and I didn't want to be too similar...I hoped that I pulled that off.
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Thanks for sharing!
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